Some of my best memories as a young boy happened in church, from being dressed to the nines, to my tiny green Bible, to the pocket full of candy my Pawpa always carried. I was very involved in church. My step-grandmother was a preacher, and our family was part of a gospel band that frequently traveled to perform on Sundays. No, I wasn’t in the band, but my sisters and I often had small singing parts during the service.
Church was happening in my home almost daily. Between band rehearsals and prayer groups, Jesus was a major part of my everyday life as a child. My family was living what I believed to be the perfect, Jesus-filled life… or so I thought.
Then something suddenly changed. My mother and stepfather went through some tough times, why, I still don’t fully know. Because of this, my sisters and I often had to move to new cities, enroll in new schools, and sometimes do this multiple times within the same school year. What once felt like a perfect life centered on Jesus began to crumble right in front of me. My life slowly drifted further and further away from Him.
By the time I reached high school, my parents had split for the final time, and my love for Jesus was no longer the same. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t hate Jesus, nor did I blame Him for their separation. But my outlook on living for Jesus and on church itself shifted dramatically. Church went from being a place I loved to a place that felt more like a business. I’m not sure if that came from seeing behind the scenes or from something deeper, but I often asked myself how a life I believed was perfectly lived for Jesus could be dismantled so quickly.
I started my own family about 28 years ago, and Jesus was never at the center of it, though I never stopped believing in Him. There was a darkness that clouded my understanding of what serving Jesus and attending church truly meant. Slowly, the temptations of the world took hold of me. I developed an unhealthy relationship with alcohol, specifically beer.
Over time, I became someone I once despised, and eventually, I no longer recognized myself. My days revolved around when my next beer bender would be. Daily headaches and waiting for the pain from the night before to wear off became my normal for more than 20 years. I was a high-functioning alcohol lover.
Looking back now, I have many regrets. I wasn’t the father I hoped to be or the husband I promised my mom I would be. I realized I had become the very thing that likely contributed to my family’s separation, and my distance from Jesus.
Then came the day.
The day my mother-in-law expressed concern for my health. With the recent passing of my own mother, her words hit me differently. I now know it was Jesus speaking through her, revealing serious health concerns I could no longer ignore. I knew I had to change, and I had to change fast.
That day, I took my very last sip of alcohol. Surprisingly, the struggle wasn’t as difficult as I expected. My eyes were opened, my head was clear, but I still felt something was missing, something that would ensure I never returned to the darkness of alcohol.
Then a voice, my wife’s voice, came to mind out of nowhere: “I wish I knew more about Jesus and could speak more intelligently about Him.” And suddenly, it hit me. I knew I needed more, but I also knew my family needed it too. In that moment, I realized we had to find a church home, not just for me, but for my family.
Sunday after Sunday, we visited churches, searching for a place where we felt welcomed and where everything aligned. Eventually, we found a church that truly felt like home again.
I began reading the Bible daily, starting with Ezekiel, because I had heard about the most perfect recipe for bread. I still read every day, often diving into multiple books, study plans, and devotionals. My mornings are now filled with quiet time, coffee, and Jesus.
That’s when my life truly took a 180-degree turn.
I found peace in the chaos of the world. I joined a Bible study. I began serving with the youth at church, things I never would have imagined myself doing less than a year earlier.
So why do I tell you all of this?
Because this is when the Lord spoke to me.
He began placing creative thoughts and ideas in my heart. I drew inspiration from Scripture, from people at church, from music, and from quiet prayer. I started writing everything down in a tiny notebook. I went straight to Hobby Lobby and bought the supplies I needed to bring those ideas to life. Jesus had reignited my creative mind.
He continued speaking to me during my morning time with Him. Then one day, a clear message came: It’s time to step out in faith. Tell your story. Share my designs.
That day, I placed my full trust in Him, believing He would lead me down the path He had chosen for me all along. That same childhood love for Jesus has returned, and I’m excited to continue this journey, sharing His work through my designs for Jesus First.
With love and gratitude...
Heath Anderson